I've been thinking about something lately. Actually... scratch that. I've been thinking about this for years, but I don't think I really had the words for it until recently.
I was talking to a client this week and she said, "I want to spend less time doing health... and more time just being healthy."
And I knew exactlyyy what she meant. I think there are a lot of women (you?) walking around who are downright exhausted from trying to take care of themselves.
They're doing a lot of things right! They're walking, lifting weights, trying to hit their protein. They're reading fiber on the nutrition labels, drinking their water, taking their supplements. They're listening to podcasts about hormones while they're making dinner.
But somehow... at some point ... taking care of themselves started feeling like another job. And not, like, a side hustle either. A full time gig!
What's WILD is that we've all just accepted that this is normal.
Whaaaaaaat?! No wonder everyone is walking around so frustrated and burnt out.
A friend says, "Ugh, I was so bad this weekend." And everyone knows exactly what she means. She ate the dessert. Or maybe skipped her workouts. She had a few drinks. She "fell off." Then Monday comes around and it's time to start over again.
"New week, new plan!" New attempt to finally become the person who has it all together. Right?
Except... what if this whole thing is a little backwards?
Most women know a lot of the "right" things to do. They've heard that protein matters by now. They know strength training matters (thank goodness!). They know sleep is huge and vegetables are probably a good idea.
The problem is that when they weren't looking, health became the thing they're chasing as the destination instead of the thing that supports everything else.
And that changes the whole kit and kaboodle!
Look, I have NO interest in my entire life revolving around being healthy.
I love health. (Clearly.)
I have spent an embarrassing amount of time in school, reading research papers, looking at labs, learning about hormones, and going down rabbit holes that most people would consider a cry for help.
But I don't want health to be my hobby. Noooo. I already have enough hobbies I want!
I want to learn a lot more Spanish. I want paddleboarding and snowboarding to appear on my calendar more often than blue moons. I want to read books that have absolutely nothing to do with mitochondria (ok fine, and some that do).
I want to wander through bookstores and hit every aisle except the nutrition section.
I want to take random classes just because why not. Pottery? Dance? Food preservation and canning? Outdoor survival skills? Buddhism? Stoicism? Maybe guitar (or I'll just keep being self taught ... which means I know like 1 chord so far).
I want to be the old lady who gardens, knows at least 3-7 birds by their songs, maybe returns to triathlons at age 80 or something, and has a million stories because she actually went out and lived a life.
That's what I want health for. It's a conduit.
A lot of people are stuck because they start with a goal like: "I want to lose 15 pounds." or "I want to tone up." or "I want to get my body back."
And those goals are fine. Really and truly! There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel good and confident and sexy in your body. But I always want my clients to ask a deeper question. Why? Why do you actually want that? And then whatever your answer is... ask why again.
Keep going. Five times.
"I want to lose 15 pounds."
Why?
"Because I don't feel comfortable in my clothes."
Why does that matter?
"Because I don't feel like myself anymore."
Why?
"Because I don't feel confident."
Why?
"Because I feel like I've been putting myself last for years and I am no longer more than a cameo actor inside my own life."
Whoa! Suddenly we're not talking about 15 pounds anymore. We're talking about feeling like yourself again. We're talking about confidence. Reinvention. Energy. Freeeeeeedom. Re-enchantment. Feeling capable. And, feeling like the woman who says yes to things instead of wondering if she's too tired, too uncomfortable, or too 'out of shape' for XYZ.
Isn't that the thing most women are actually chasing??
Not a scale number or a "perfect body". Not a life where they never eat a cookie again.
(Please. I would like to personally unsubscribe from any version of health that includes never eating a cookie.)
They're chasing a life where their body feels like home.
Which brings me to a question I love asking people...
What if you never had to work out again? What if you never had to eat another vegetable? What if you never had to prioritize protein? What if you never had to go for another walk?
You don't. Nobody is forcing you. You're a whole adult at your big age. You can absolutely choose not to do those things. So why do you? Why do you keep coming back to them?
At some point, those things stop feeling like rules or obligations or To Dos and just become part of who you are.
You don't brush your teeth every night because you're forcing yourself to be a "tooth-brushing person." You do it because that's just what you do. And you don't get to Friday night and go, "I was SO good this week b/c I didn't miss any tooth-brushing sessions so I will celebrate by skipping brushing my teeth this weekend and by Monday morning, I'll have to start over."
Hmm.
The healthiest people I know don't love every workout (or even most). They don't always choose the salad with protein. Or wake up every morning more excited to eat green beans than you.
They're normal humans! (Well, maybe not fully normal. Fully normal people scare me. I have a theory that everyone is weird and if I can't see your weird it means you are hiding it and that's even more concerning to me.)
But I digress ....
The healthiest people I know decided something about themselves ... they are someone who takes care of themselves.
Period.
They're not trying to earn worth. They don't hate their body. They're not terrified of aging. They don't feel forced to do a bazillion healthy habits that compete with the rest of their life.
They value themselves enough to show up. For some, it even feels like an act of rebellion to live in a society and at a time where being unhealthy is SO easy and status quo, returning to "nature" in the way of caring for our human condition is BOLD.
That is such a different energy!
So if your health journey feels exhausting right now...
If it feels like another thing on your never-ending list...
Maybe the question should be, "How can I make this so much more a part of my life that I don't have to think about it all the time?"
Your healthiest years shouldn't be spent obsessing over being healthy. Right? They should be spent using that health. Taking trips. Trying new things. Playing The Floor is Lava with your kids or grandkids. Taking a ridiculous dance class with your best friend because you can ... where everyone else knew the routine ahead of time except you two and it was just as embarrassing but 10x more fun than you would've imagined. (True story from a few months ago).
Your healthiest years should be laughing until your face hurts. Health should make your world b i g g e r.
So yes, our bodies do thrive when we care for them with exercise, sleep, nutrition, stress resilience strategies, beautiful connections, sunshine. But what would it be like to become someone who weaves those things in because it's just who you are, not because it's another chore?
Every year we get (chronologically) older. Apparently that part is happening whether we like it or not. Haha! But ... what if every year was actually an opportunity to level up?
To become wiser. Oh yeah! Kinder. More confident. More boundaried. (We LOVE a confident, boundaried, peaceful woman, don't we??) More playful. Endlessly curious.
More YOU.
You don't want to spend the next 20 years trying to "fix" yourself so you can finally start living then.
You want to use these health gains as the launchpad!
Things like a stronger body, better labs, the energy of a yellow lab pup is the starting line for every single goal you have right now. Your hobbies, social life, volunteer and community work, career, side hustle, biggest travel experience you're manifesting right now, and favorite people's core memories of you all start with you being VIBRANT ... and you know it.
And this is what we talk about inside The Metabolic Edge.
Yes, we talk about the practical stuff: fat loss, building muscle, workouts, meals, hormones, understanding your lab work, and all the physiology nerdiness that makes my brain oh-so-happy. But the bigger goal is helping you become the kind of person who takes those health wins and spirals UP.
It's about feeling better in your body so you can feel more alive inside your life.
The doors to The Metabolic Edge will be opening again in a couple of weeks. If you've been reading these newsletters and thinking, "Oh hell yeah...this is exactly what I need," hop on the waitlist so you can be the first to know when enrollment opens.
Your coolest years are still ahead .... and they told me to tell you to think about BEING health. It feels a lot different than doing or performing health. Try it!
Stay wild + well,
Tara
